Building a Resilient Mindset: Overcoming Entrepreneurial Setbacks

Speaker A00:00:00

You're building something incredible. You're putting in the work. You're pouring your heart into your business. But then it happens. A major client leaves, a big project falls through.Cash flow takes an unexpected hit.Or maybe, just maybe, it's a string of small frustrations that pile up and you feel that familiar punch to the gut, that feeling of being knocked down. Does that moment fill you with dread? Do you question everything? Do you wonder to yourself if you have what it takes to get back up?Or if this is just a sign to just throw in a towel and just quit, just walk away. That fear of setbacks, that struggle to recover when things go wrong, it's a silent barrier to your biggest dreams. It keeps you playing small.It steals your peace. But what if setbacks weren't the end? What if they're simply a part of the journey?And what if you could learn to not just survive them, but but use them to become stronger, wiser, and more unstoppable than ever before? Well, today we're going to talk about building a truly resilient mindset.I'm going to give you some gritty, actionable steps to overcome entrepreneurial setbacks so you can bounce back stronger every single time. I'm going to even share my story about when I lost my two biggest clients and, man, it put me into a spiral of despair.And today I'm going to show you how you can avoid that yourself. So stay with me. This is is about building that staying power.

Speaker B00:01:28

Running a business isn't easy. It's long hours, tough calls and relentless pressure. No shortcuts, no handouts. Just grit, grind and the will to keep going when most would quit.Welcome to Grit and Growth Business, the show for entrepreneurs who know success is built the hard way. Hosted by Ralph Estepp Jr. A seasoned business coach, accountant and fellow fighter in the trenches.Each episode brings you real talk, proven strategies, and the unfiltered truth about what it really takes to build something that lasts. Because if you've got persistence, perseverance and determination, this is the place for you. This is grit and growth Business.

Speaker A00:02:15

Hey there, friend. Welcome back to Grit and Growth Business. I'm Ralph Estep Jr.If you missed last week's show, we talked about the three levels of business growth and how to identify where your business is now to help you strategize your next move forward.If you missed last week's show, you can find all of our shows@gritandgrowthbusiness.com well, this week we're moving into a topic that is absolutely non Negotiable for every single entrepreneur. Yes. If you're an entrepreneur, today's show is for you.It's a muscle that you've got to build to stay in the game if you want to stay in there long term. And that's this building a resilient mindset.We're going to talk about overcoming entrepreneurial setbacks because, look, I wish I could tell you that once you master your numbers, once you build those systems, once you attract and gain those clients, and once you scale that business, it's all smooth sailing. But if you're in business right now, you know that's a not true statement, but it's not the truth of entrepreneurship at all.Setbacks are not possibilities. Setbacks are guaranteed. They're part of the landscape.And the question today isn't if you'll face those setbacks because you're going to face them, but it's how you respond to them when they hit. And they're going to hit you because, listen, I've been knocked down. I've been knocked down more times than I care to remember.And I can remember one particular period early in my career. I just started to feel like I was finally getting some momentum in my business. Now I'll forget it.It was like yesterday, I lost my two largest clients almost simultaneously for reasons that were completely out of my control. And I felt like I got punched in the gut, like I was in a title fight, man. I got put down like the rug had been pulled out from under me.And I remember looking at my projections and I saw this huge gaping hole in my revenue and a wave of panic just washed completely over me. I doubted everything. I doubted my abilities. I doubted my business model. I even asked myself, was I cut out for this?I felt a deep sense of despair and agonizing mix of fear and frustration and anger and exhaustion. To be honest with you, I was crushed. I worried about paying my bills. I worried about feeding my wife and my two young boys at home.I even wondered if my business would be able to recover from this. It was hard to get out of bed in the morning. My energy was gone.That feeling of being crushed by circumstances or watching my hard work seemingly unraveling. And if you've ever been through that, it's incredibly isolating, isn't it? And it makes you feel alone, doesn't it?For me, it made me want to throw in the towel and just go get a 9 to 5 job. But I want you to hear something. I want you to hear it loud and clear. Grit isn't just about starting strong. That's a great place to start.But grit is about rebounding. It's about what you do when the market shifts.It's about what you do when a key team member leaves, or when a product launch flops, or when a competitor emerges all of a sudden in your market. And listen, I've certainly experienced all those in the past 30 years.As you're listening right now, how about you see, it's about having the inner strength to absorb the blow, to learn from it and to come back even stronger. See that right there? That's where grit really makes you dig deep. And as I said, it takes a resilient mindset.So I thought today I'd start by talking about what are some common anxieties and painful costs of not having that resilient mindset. Because listen, setbacks inevitably hit and I didn't have it at first.So I'm going to share with you what I've seen and then I'm going to talk to you about how to overcome them. The first one I've seen is paralysis and giving up prematurely. For so many of us, we just walk away and quit.I remember when I lost my two major clients, I felt completely stuck. I was paralyzed for several days, to be honest with you, probably a couple weeks. I was unable to move forward. I felt this loss of my dreams.I felt that I had wasted all this effort to build this business. And I had this deep sense of regret. I started to abandon my potential because I didn't know how to rebound. I didn't have those skills.And I've seen entrepreneurs with brilliant business ideas fold their businesses after just one major customer complaint or one failed marketing campaign. Why? Because they didn't have the mental tools to process it and move on.Well, here's another one I've seen and honestly, I've experienced this myself. That's overwhelming self doubt and imposter syndrome. Have you ever felt that?Because setbacks, especially personal ones, those setbacks can feel like definitive proof that you're not good enough, that you're a fraud.And the pain here is a complete erosion of your confidence, Constant second guessing yourself and fear of taking on any new risks, you start to internalize a setback as a personal failure. I'm a failure. You don't see it what it truly is. And that's a business challenge. And here's a brutal lesson I'm going to tell you right now.The truth is you simply cannot be an entrepreneur if you suffer from self doubt. You're not going to make it if you have self doubt.If you can't learn to be resilient and have that mindset, hang up the towel now go work for somebody else. Because it's not going to work. Because it takes grit to take new risks. And I felt this when I lost those clients.I remember back then, I circled the wagons. I refused to even consider taking any new risk because I didn't internalize the loss, considered myself a huge failure.I was gonna even put myself out there. It was a dark time. And it led to the next problem, which is number three on my list. And that's fear of taking future risks.It's that old adage of once burned, twice shy. Have you ever felt that? Man, I've been burned once. I'm not going down that road again. I've learned the pain.See, a painful setback can make you risk averse. It leads you to Planet Safe. It'll lead you to avoiding innovation.And then you start to shy away from those ambitious goals that you set for yourself. You start to be in this stagnant growth stage. Let's be honest, to be blunt, there's no growth at all.You miss opportunities for expansion and if you're not careful, your business never reaches its full potential. Why? Because you become afraid to stretch. Your business shrinks as a result. You create your own self fulfilling prison.There's a, there's a mental idea for you because you're unwilling and unable to break out of it. It can feel paralyzing. And this mentality unfortunately leads to number four on my list.And that's emotional drain and spilling into in your personal life. Because here's something you need to understand. Unresolved setbacks fester. They're like a sore.If you don't go and attack that sore, get rid of the infection, it's just gonna fester. That frustration, that anger you feel, that sadness, maybe it's from the business challenges, but it bleeds into your personal life.It affects your relationships, it affects your health, even affects your joy. And I'm gonna tell you my own story. This is the honest to God truth.When I lost those two clients, I was a complete bear to my wife and I was a complete bear to my kids for several weeks. In my perceived business failure, it nearly led to a marriage failure.That frustration, that anger that I felt, that sadness, I wish I could tell you it stayed in the office, but it didn't. It followed me home and right into my family life. And if I'm being totally transparent, my wife Took the brunt of it. God bless her.I don't know how she did it. As a matter of fact, I want to share something with you. Today is our 25th wedding anniversary. So if my wife is listening, happy anniversary.But she took the brunt of it. My kids saw the nasty side of dad. And I've shared this on the show. It just further led to my health issues. Talk about Joy. Joy was completely gone.I was in complete sadness. I was in a deep depression, to be honest. I felt the pain of chronic stress. I felt bitterness. I had sleepless nights.And I had a sense that my business was poisoning everything else. Because the truth is, it was poisoning my entire life, which led me to the most insidious problem.This is number five on my list, reputational damage. And here's the sad part. Most of the time it's self inflicted. Because here's the truth.If you crumble under pressure, if you become unresponsive or you react poorly to setbacks, it will damage your reputation with your clients, it will damage your reputation with your partners, and it will destroy your team. I want you to hear me on that. But because if you crumble under pressure, it will destroy your clients, your partners and your team. Why?Because people don't trust you. People don't understand that you're not going to be able to get past this. It damages those relationships.When you're in that funk, when you're in that bad place, it makes it almost impossible to attract future talent or you're not going to attract new clients. And if you don't work at it, your lack of resilience is going to create more problems than the initial setback ever could have created.I'm going to tell you right now, looking back at that time now, when I lost those two clients, my attitude was terrible. I told you a few minutes ago, I fell into this deep depression. I suffered from anger, I suffered from frustration. I had a complete lack of energy.And looking back at it now, it nearly crippled the remaining part of my business. I lost all the energy to manage the clients I still had. I didn't lose all my clients, but I lost energy toward him. I just didn't care anymore.Nearly cost me everything. Now let me ask you right now, do any of these resonate with you? Do you feel any of those things? If you do, guess what? You're not alone.These are common. These are deeply felt consequences. But here's something you need to hear.These are consequences that can be avoided if you strategically build that resilient mindset let me tell you right now, if I only knew then what I know that I'm about to share with you now, I could have avoided so much pain. I could have avoided so much problems in my business and honestly in my family and my home life. But let me start by saying something critical.And I want you to hear this. Pause what you're doing right now, because you need to hear this. The power of building a resilient mindset isn't about being immune to pain.I'm not telling you yet. You're going to become immune to pain. That's not. You're never going to be immune to pain. In fact, I think that's a negative.If you want to put something on it, it's a negative, negative way to think about it. It's not about that. It's about having the tools to process it.It's about having the tools to learn from it, and it's about having the tools to bounce back with greater strength and greater clarity. It's about turning obstacles into stepping stones.So let me ask you right now, before we go any further, are you ready to create some stepping stones?If you are, let's get into it, because I want to share some concrete, actionable steps that you can take right away if you really want to start cultivating your resilient mindset. And listen, I didn't do this right. So much of what I'm going to share with you, I was a failure at.But if you'll learn from me, you can possibly overcome this. It starts with this. You've got to acknowledge and process. This is not the time to suppress it.So many of these clowns that you hear these business gurus say, well, just move forward, push forward. I'm going to call this the pity party with a timer. Because when a setback hits, and like I said earlier, you will experience setbacks.If you're going to be in business for any length of time, you're going to experience setbacks. And your first instinct might be, I'm just gonna ignore it. I lost two clients. I don't even need it. I'm gonna push through it.I'm gonna pretend that it doesn't hurt. But guess what? That's a really bad plan. Don't do that, because it does hurt. You gotta allow yourself to feel that emotion.As men, we don't want to experience our emotions, especially when it comes to the business world. I'm gonna be tough. I'm gonna be the tough guy. I'm just gonna. I'm gonna push Through. And I'm gonna pretend it doesn't hurt. Well, guess what?It does hurt. It does hurt you at your core. So you got to start by allowing yourself to feel that emotion.Feel that frustration, feel that anger, Embrace that sadness and recognize that disappointment. Because you are frustrated. You are angry. You do have sadness, and you're disappointed.If you're a human being and you're an entrepreneur, you didn't go into this to fail. You didn't go into this to have setbacks. So you are frustrated, you are angry, you are sad, and you are disappointed. So embrace that.But here's the main point. Set a time limit for that. Give yourself 15 minutes. Give yourself 30 minutes. Hey, maybe even an hour. If you're.If you're really in a bad place, give yourself a day. But truly feel it. Truly vent it. Be angry, be sad. But then when that timer goes off, you gotta pivot. And maybe for you, you journal about.You write about it. Maybe for you, talk to a trusted mentor or a peer. Now, listen, this isn't somebody that's just gonna commiserate with you.This isn't a time to throw a big pity party, invite all these people over. Let's all have a pity party and feel bad for Ralph. That's not the time to do that. You gotta find and listen. Little side note here.Find that, go to person that will motivate you to move forward. Even when you're down and out. You gotta find it if you want to be successful. What I have found my clients who are the most successful.Have those go to people that will give them a swift kick in the buttock sometimes. And see, I'd love to tell you that I was able to follow my advice. Like I said earlier, I wasn't able to find my voice.I wish I could tell you that when I lost those two big clients, I gave myself the ability to feel that despair for a good hour or a good day. That's just not true. I shared with you earlier.It took me several weeks, and I'd love to tell you that I wrote every horrible thought down, that I journaled it, that I. That I went and talked to a mentor, that I was. That I was able to not complain. I wish I could tell you that.I wish I could say that this just happened, but what's my next move? That I was able to pivot. But as I shared earlier, that was not what I did.Well, so now I can share with you how to do it right, Because I learned the hard way. I've talked about that on the show a lot of times.Much of what I share on this show every week is about learning thing the hard way so you don't have to do that yourself. But it's all about using a structured process. Hey, my dad used to say this all the time. He used to say this to me constantly.Do as I say, son, not as I do. That's sage advice. But as they say, hindsight's 20 20.But if you're going to be effective in this, acknowledge the pain, acknowledge the hurt, acknowledge the disappointment. Set a timer and then work at making a better decision. Let's move on to the second critical move, and this one is extremely critical as well.You've got to separate yourself from the outcome. So many people take it as a personal failure.You got to understand it's the situation, it's not you, because so many times it's going to feel like it's all about you. But that's not what a setback is. A setback is information. It's not a personal indictment.I'm going to say something here which is going to sound a little harsh. There's information in that. Some of it might be, hey, you know what? I need to work a little harder.I've had times in my career when I look back at it, and I had a setback, I was like, you know what, Ralph, you got to put a little more effort into this. But don't take it as a personal indictment. Your business decision or outcome might have failed, but you are not a failure.Individually, you're not a failure. I want to say that again because you need to hear it. You are not a failure. So analyze what went wrong, not who is wrong.This is the time to focus on controllable factors for the future. Externalize the problem. See, it's different to say the marketing campaign didn't work.Then I'm a bad marketer because I used to take every negative outcome personally. If I lost a client, that was a personal indictment. That was an attack on me.But when I finally started to separate the event from my identity, I could look at it objectively. It's kind of like a doctor diagnosing a patient.A doctor isn't experiencing what the patient's experiencing because if we're not careful, we can judge ourselves and we condemn ourselves way too hard. And I remember now looking back at it, it shifted my energy from shame to problem solving.Because, listen, as a judge, you're going to be harder on yourself and condemn yourself far more than anybody else will. Another thing to Be truly successful. You need to learn to extract the lesson. I talked about that a second ago. But you've got to really do this.You've got to extract the lesson. It's about finding the gold in the mud. I thought that was a good way of saying it. What's the gold in the mud?See, every single setback, no matter how painful, contains a lesson. My grandfather used to say this to me all the time. What's the lesson here? What do you learn from this? What's the gold in the mud?You can just picture that in your own mind. You got this big pile of mud in front of you, but you can just. You push through it and you see that piece of gold there.But every single setback has a lesson into it. Your challenge is how to find it. Ask yourself this. What did I learn from this? What could I have done differently?How can I prevent this from happening again? And this is one of the greatest lessons I ever learned. I told you in a previous show that I took the Dale Carnegie training.One of the things that we learned in that was to accept the worst possible outcome, no matter what it would be. And we work like hell to make it better. But it comes down to understanding, learning, and preventing it.Because this turns failure into tuition, it makes you smarter and stronger for your next challenge. Let me tell you about my particular situation. That client loss taught me a painful lesson of client concentration. That's what I love.I learned from that point. I never let any single client represent too large a percentage of my revenue. I didn't want to have two big clients that were 30% of my revenue.And I live by this. Today. I rarely take on large clients. I have from time to time, but I prefer many small clients instead of those large ones.It's a lesson learned from me. It hurt. I found the gold in the mud, but it forced me to diversify, which made my business far more stable in the long run.Yes, it was a very expensive lesson, but. But it was invaluable. Here's my next piece of advice. Re. Engage with your why and your vision. Because this will fuel your perseverance.When you're knocked down, it's so easy to lose sight of the why you started your business. Remind yourself. Go back to that core purpose. Go back to that passion.Go back to thinking about the impact you wanted to make when you launched your business. Maybe you've got that vision board. Maybe it's tucked away in the closet now, but pull that thing out. Read old testimonials. Here's A pro tip.One of the things that a mentor told me, he says, keep those testimonials within reach at all times. Ralph. Those testimonies will be your lifeline in times of trouble.So when you have that setback, read those testimonies, connect with your favorite client, maybe hear another success story of somebody you've worked with. Because that's going to fuel your perseverance and remind you of the bigger picture.And you're going to need the emotional energy to get you back in the fight. Because here's the thing, you got to get back in the fight. You got to get up and start fighting again.And it's also imperative to take one small, deliberate action forward, even when you've been knocked down. Why? Because motion creates emotion. Don't wait for motivation to strike. Because here's the truth. Motivation often follows action.Even if you're feeling overwhelmed, identify the smallest possible action that you can take to move forward.Maybe a single email, Just send a single email, maybe a 15 minute research session, a single phone call to that client that you can always help that person that makes you feel good about your business. Because just one small step can help you regain momentum.That initial push, no matter how small, will create energy that you need for the next step and the next step. And I remember after my client lost, the smallest step was literally updating my prospect.I delved right into who are the people I've been talking to lately? Who can I send proposal to? Yeah, it kind of felt insignificant at the time, but looking back, it was motion.And that motion slowly built into momentum and eventually it completely revitalized client pipeline. Yes, I was able to recover from that. See, here's what I want you to hear today. Building a resilient mindset isn't about avoiding pain.You're going to have pain if you're going to be a successful small business person. You're going to have setbacks.What it's really about is building the internal fortitude to navigate it, to learn from it, and to bounce back stronger every single time. It's your superpower as an entrepreneur, because I know this.You've got the grit to build, but now you got to apply that grit to mastering your bounce back ability.So I want to ask you right now if this episode has resonated with you today, if you're feeling that sting of a recent setback, maybe you're going through that right now. You're like, ralph, man, I'm right there with you.Or maybe now I've planted some seeds and you have this fear of future challenges and you're thinking, oh, I'm going to restrain a little bit, Ralph. I'm going to, I'm going to not take your advice and I'm going to, I'm going to draw back. I'm not going to take any risks.Or maybe you're just tired of doing it alone. You're tired of trying to figure out how to rebound by yourself. I want to invite you to take a deeper step. See this podcast.The reason I do this podcast, it's designed to give you some strategies. But sometimes you need more than strategies. What you really need is some personalized guidance. Someone who's been there.Listen, you heard today's story. I've been there. A couple weeks ago, I shared my own three pillars for business success.But maybe you need somebody who understands your unique challenges, who can help you process those setbacks constructively.Maybe you need that mentor that I talked about who can help you identify the key lessons and guide you step by step to build unshakable mental toughness. Because, listen, if you're going to be an entrepreneur, you're going to be on this journey. You need mental toughness.Imagine, if you will, having a trusted advisor in your corner. Someone to help you strategize your recovery, to help you refine your mindset, to hold you accountable to those crucial rebound actions.Well, you're in luck because that's exactly what I offer through my coaching services.So if you're ready for that one on one support, if you're ready to transform obstacles into opportunities and start building with a clear, proven path of resilience, I want to invite you right now to explore my coaching services. Now listen, these aren't about me telling you what to do, but it's about us working together. We're going to work side by side.I'm going to help you unlock your next level of grit and growth and, and truly thrive. No matter what comes your way.You can learn more about my no pressure discovery call to see if coaching is the right fit for you by visiting gritandgrowthbusiness.com coaching. Just go right to the website. Again, that's grit and growth business.com coaching. Let's talk about how we can build your legacy together.I want to work with you one on one. It all starts with a free discovery call. We'll get to know each other and see if it's a good fit.Now, for everyone else, I want to help you navigate these inevitable challenges as well and apply the core strategies I talked about today. So I've built a simple action plan sheet for the episode.You know, I build one of these for every show because I want to give you some takeaways, things you can like. Ralph, you covered a lot today. But what can I do to take. So I built this action plan.It's called Building a Resilient Mindset, Overcoming Entrepreneurial Setbacks. And it's free.It's a downloadable sheet that will guide you through everything we've talked about and acknowledging and processing, separating yourself from the outcome, extracting the lesson, reengaging with your why and taking a deliberate action forward. I want to just give you this practical tool to help you integrate these lessons into your own unique path. And it's absolutely free.You can download it now by going to my website. That's@gritandgrowthbusiness.com action. Again, that's gritandgrowthbusiness.com action.So go ahead and download that action plan sheet and start to build your resilient mindset today. Listen, setbacks are not the end of your story. They are tough. You're going to have them.They're a forge where true grit is tested and where true grit is strengthened. So embrace them today. Embrace them as opportunities to learn. Embrace them as opportunities to pivot.And embrace them as opportunities to grow into the powerful entrepreneur you're meant to be. Because I know this, you've got this. And I'm here walking alongside you every step of the way.So thank you for joining me on Grit and Growth Business. My mission every week is to empower small business owners just like you to build thriving, profitable businesses.And I'm committed to bringing you honest conversations and practical strategies every single week to help your business build the right way.Now, next week, we're going to talk about getting into another crucial topic, and that is profit first principles, how to guarantee your business is always profitable. That's right. I'm going to show you how to make your business profitable from the start.A lot of people talk about, well, you're not going to show a profit for the first couple of years. That's hogwash.I can help you make a powerful system to manage your money and ensure profitability from day one, not just to make sure your bills are paid. So make sure you're subscribed. You go right to our website and follow the show@grit and growth business.com. you don't want to miss next week's show.It's going to be empowering. And don't forget to download our free action plan.That's@gritandgrowthbusiness.com Action, as always, say, if you listen to the show, intentions are great, they're fantastic, but they don't get you anywhere. Actions are what matters. So put today's strategies into action. God bless you. And I'll see you next week for another meeting in the trenches.